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Alana Winter

Very good Peter. I can't wait to see someone copy this and post it for real. There are already lots of people who hire some one to write their blog posts. Every PR agency is offering to do that for their clients now - why not go full service?!?
Hey - we could start an agency and call it "Virtual Me"...

peter hirshberg

Alana, whats weird is that while its a joke, it isn't. The whole thread at monitor talent deal with all the real issues surrounding this. One the other hand, if we had subscriptions from only 1% of all Americans and they paid us $15.00 a month....


In the old days they called this a "secretary" or a "wife." I prefer your modern twist.

John Zeisler

This is a great idea, and worth investigating! We're all way too busy in our lives to stop every 5 minutes to Twitter when we're taking a crap or buying a Peet's. You should post this on eLance or Odesk and see what comes back. I'll bet there are a lot of qualified posts, and trying to find help thru Craigslist is sort of like buying a Chrylser. There are better global alternatives to consider. Go for it!

Malcolm Hobbs

Great ideas...but somehow reminiscent of the New Yorker cartoon from 20+ years ago of a lecture hall full of empty seats with tape recorders (old cartoon) recording a lecture from a professor being played back from a tape recorder...if a blog falls in the woods...

yossi vardi

I always knew you are a genius, but I would like to take your ingenious idea one step further !Isn't now the age of computing and spiritual machines. Did you forget ? Why do manually something which can be automated ? The right approach is that someone will develop a bot that will do all of it automatically . why spending human time and ingenuity on something that with the aid of AI and semantic web can be done by a bot? My bot , your bot and all our friends' bots will continuesly surf the web, post and mine things on blogs, facebook, youtube, twitter, myspace etc, will dialogue with each other , will IM each other, and save us the time and the agony associated with maintaining and promoting our virtual identity on the web. The bot which will recruit the largest number of Bot-friends will be the winner. And while they are doing it, we will be freed to go and develop a whole new way of interaction: meeting face to face, talking face to face, touching each other, hugging each other ,and having good time on the beach or where ever!.
I will call my bot " I seek Me"

Bob Kalsey

Craigslist would probably have been cool with this posting, Peter, if you'd left out the term "Homo erectus." They probably got the wrong idea.

peter hirshberg

Yossi...i sure hope you own the iseekme url!

And you are absolutely right. The only possible future for our species is to evolve a bot and get on with things in an efficient manner.

Which is why i was so excited to learn that watson and crick found that human cells have not only DNA and RNA but also APIs. And what is so heartening is that mankind is just about to decode the human API for the first time ever. Few people realize that craig venter has been sailing the world trying to understand and code to it for years. And once the human API is wired to facebook and twitter and the iphone then we can let some damn bodily organ spend all day friending and responding to twits and trying to monetize itself while metabolizing glycogen. And we can get on with mankind's greater purpose: attending conferences.

see you at kinnernet!

warm regards

Lisa Romano

There's been a lot of talk about this lately in certain circles so it's not that far off. So what I want to know is what happens to the "authenticity" that social media proclaims is of the utmost importance? Will there be a time when the reaction will be the same as when you meet a celebrity - they look nothing like their pictures and are not nearly as articulate?! And when do we get a break to just be ourselves?

peter hirshberg


I think that's the problem, and why i found this a bit absurd in the first place.

Taken to extreme social media lets us be less ourselves and more a brand representation of ourselves that must satisfy its followers as brands do. The joke about Homo Brandus, man the brand, is that we're evolving into something that gives us a lot less time just to be. And if we do spend time just being we aren't tending to our public lives. i think its one of the essential things that's emerging about the new media environment. A lot of adults i know who are deep into it take a deep dive and then retreat for lack of time and then may take a dive again.
To turn it into a pun, where's our Walden Pond to go twit in solitude?

There is a balance between getting the serendipitous and delightful value from face book and being a slave to it. Of course , mankind has had the same issue with booze for thousands of years!

It would be pretty funny if just as brands are becoming more authentic, people have to become more like manufactured brands!

And yes, the funny job description i wrote is only about 2 degrees off from a lot of real job descriptions.
Write a comment...

Paul Pruneau

Well this is interesting.
What exactly are the qualifications of a brand assistant?

Do they have to have depth and breath of experience in creating a formal brand positioning for you that will be the foundation for defining the unique value that you offer your friends, associates, business prospects and others?

Do they have to have have a portfolio of awards from an industry resource validating their experience and fluency in creating original content with the ability and expertise to conceive, develop and produce blog posts, integrate multi-media, optimize SEO, shoot/cut/edit videos, assemble compelling images, animation, illustration, and everything else that the current environment suggests as necessary to promote brand YOU (Thank you Tom Peters)?

And what are the KPI’s for this position?
Number of posts that make a high ranking in digg?
Percentage of lift in your number of friends on FB?
Frequency of retweets to the tusnami of tweets from Alltop and others?

Will there be adequate compensation incentives for building your brand value and setting you up for a liquidity event?
An M&A

Will Craig’s list be the most effective place to find qualified candidates?

So much to consider.
Time may be our guide.

Peg Samuel

Peter, as always, you crack me up! The job description is priceless. I know a few "public" figures that do this, but unsuccessfully b/c the intern or whomever they have posting isn't communicating back to people intelligently thus making it a one way "look at me". Twittering or Facebooking and not interacting with others, is like going to a party walking around and just talking about yourself then leaving...everyone says, "now who was that self absorbed person?"

Simon Firth

Peter -- I had the same thought about people who 'ghost twitter.' See my job description here: http://simonfirth.wordpress.com/2009/03/27/a-growth-market-for-writers-celebrity-ghosttweeter/

Mel Kleiman

Peter I am in the slow group since I don't read a lot of blogs. But I will tell you that many of the best speakers out there have someone who does exactly what you are talking about and if they didn't once they ready your blog they would go out and try and find someone to manage their on line presents.

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This is fantastic and a work of a genius...well it goes to show that humans are always breaking barriers and I guess the only limit is Really your IMAGINATION...

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Peter I am in the slow group since I don't read a lot of blogs


In the old days they called this a "secretary" or a "wife." I prefer your modern twist.

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